Are you looking for the ultimate life of freedom and adventure with your significant other? Then van life might be for you! Waking up to beautiful views everyday, eating delicious food and making memories to last a lifetime together sounds like a dream for most of us.
However being together 24/7 in a very small living space can cause some issues and be a big challenge for even the closest of couples. If you want to avoid being abandoned at the side of the road, check out our 10 top tips below on how to survive van life as a couple.
Our top tips on how to survive van life as a couple.
1. Plan to spend some time apart
When you live in a van, it is easy to end up spending 24/7 together. Alone time is important for any couple as it helps you relax, appreciate what you have and maintain a connection with yourself. It doesn’t matter how much time you spend apart, it might only be 10 minutes or it might be a full day, however by having some alone time, it will strengthen your relationship and help avoid arguments.
Personally, we find that if one person goes to a cafe to work for the day and one person works in the van it provides a healthy balance. Taking a walk, exercising or reading alone are also nice ways to refresh your mind. When you spend time apart, you also have more topics to discuss when you see each other again. It’s a win win!
2. Do a test run
Before heading off on a long trip, it’s a good idea to do a test run together in the van to see how you get along. Living in a small space is not easy and by having a 1 or 2 week test run, you can try and fix any issues you have before setting off for a much longer time.
You can also make any necessary changes to the van such as adding a roofbox or making repairs before leaving for your longer trip.
3. Divide responsibilities
There are a lot of duties that come with vanlife and it’s not fair if one person feels like they are doing all the work so it’s a good idea to share responsibilities. For example with us, Shota is always responsible for garbage disposal or ensuring the van has enough gasoline whereas Ruth is responsible for laundry and grocery shopping. Other daily duties like cooking, making the bed and washing up can also be shared so it feels fair.
4. Buy a good van
Engine troubles are a nightmare and can cause a lot of stress on a relationship if you are living in your van for an extended time. It is recommended to buy the best van you can as this will hopefully avoid many of the engine troubles that might come with an old van and in turn, help avoid any arguments in your relationship.
5. Don’t blame each other
Travelling in a van and moving from place to place everyday can be stressful. It’s easy to blame your partner for something that has gone wrong for example running out of gasoline, staying overnight in a bad place or forgetting to buy toothpaste. All of these problems are annoying but they can be easily solved. Instead of getting annoyed or blaming each other, it is best to work together as a team and find a solution.
6. Sleep and wake up at the same time
Since you will be living in a very small space, going to sleep and waking up at the same time helps reduce frustrations in your relationship. If one person stays awake very late listening to music or reading with the light on, it might annoy the other person.
The same situation might happen in the morning if one person wakes up early and wants to start making coffee or breakfast but can’t because the other person is still sleeping and the bed is blocking access to the kitchen.
7. Having separate storage areas
Having designated storage areas for each person also helps reduce frustrations as each person can bring whatever clothes or toiletries they want without them getting in the way of the other person. It’s important to keep the belongings in these areas because if items are lying around in the van, it can start to annoy the other person in the couple since it’s such a small space.
8. Share the driving if possible
Driving long distances can be really tiring and if one person is doing all the driving they might get burnt out or start getting annoyed because they feel like they are doing all the work. The driving doesn’t need to be split 50/50 but even if it is split 80/20 it still can help and it means the main driver can have some time to relax and enjoy the views.
9. Set a budget
One of the main things couples argue about in life is money. We found that setting a monthly budget of ¥150,000 for everything including gasoline, groceries, onsens, eating out and activities was a nice goal to work towards. It means that one person is not spending more than the other person which might cause resentment and arguments.
Click here to see a blog post where we share how much van life in Japan costs.
Check out the video below where we breakdown our monthly spending.
10. Meet other van lifers
While travelling, it is likely that you will come across other people also living in their vans. Most van lifers are super friendly and love to talk about where they have been and where they are going next. You might even find out about some fab hidden spots! It’s nice to spend time chatting or sharing a beer with other people and it will provide a change of atmosphere from it being just the two of you.
